I learned at a very early age that when a man wanted sex, you didn’t say no. After I left home for college, I couldn’t say no to the first guy, or the second and third (together). This eventually got me pregnant, and then what do I do? The man I was sure was the father denied that it was even possible, due to a vasectomy. To this day, I don’t believe that.
Alcohol came into the picture, but it didn’t change anything. The abuse continued for years, and I allowed it to. Why?
No just wasn’t a part of my vocabulary. You got slapped if you said no, then told to do what you were told.
The night before I went in the Navy, my recruiter picked me up and took me to a drive-in movie. I have absolutely no idea what the movie was. He had brought a gallon of OJ, and a fifth of vodka, my favorite.
You guessed it but that time it was forced on me. The next day I was sworn into the Navy as though nothing had ever happened. While I was in the Navy, I was in class, and in training with both men and women, but I kept enough alcohol in me that I became obnoxious, and that kept people away.
But alcohol ended my Navy career, and helped me into a mental breakdown. I was in and out of mental wards more often than you can even imagine. I was drugged up so much that I had four car accidents in two months, one where I sideswiped a police car. I got a ticket that day. Fortunately for me I wasn’t drunk, just over medicated. I really thought that my life was over as I knew it.
And the saga continues…