As I sit here in the humid air,
I wonder, does anyone care?
That I go up, and I go down,
Causing everyone to frown.
Because no one knows what next will come,
As I bounce around my home.
I see myself as very small,
So others can’t see me at all.
There is always the choice of pain,
But then I lose, once again.
The fight I fight every day,
So that I might make my way,
To a place where I’m not seen at all,
No one to observe the fall.
As I jump off the cliff again,
Hoping someone will understand.
The pain that’s trapped inside of me,
I hide behind so no one can see.
If you saw me on the way,
To another painful, dreaded day.
Each day harder than the last,
The meds no longer give a blast.
That takes me from dawn to dusk, in pain.
Nothing can ease the way I feel,
To me, the feelings all too real.
Who am I inside this shell?
That takes me straight to hell.
~ van ~